coyotesuspect | SPN 5.22: It's a Love Story, Baby

I spent the first four hours after the show ended getting very, very drunk and crying, and the four immediately after that sleeping it off. Now I am mostly sober, less emotionally devastated, and able and willing to write a cogent review.

To begin with what I found most problematic: the ending.

It was neither the ending I’d hoped for nor expected. It was not the ending I would have written, and I’m still not completely satisfied. The ending I wanted was the boys jumping into Hell together- maybe even driving in together, rock music blaring and figurative guns blazing. I can accept them dead and I can accept them alive so long as they’re together. (Though I would greatly prefer the latter.)

But, to address the ending that actually was*, I get it. At first, I was mad at Dean. So very, very mad at Dean. Yes, he was beautiful this episode, I forgave him multiple times for any slights perceived or committed, but my first reaction- childishly, selfishly- was for him to say “screw that” to Sam’s dying wish and commit his life to either finding a way to get Sam back or entering self-destruct mode.

Instead he chose Ben and Lisa. Not because they’re his happy ending, because they aren’t, and that’s very obvious, I think. But because it’s what Sam wanted. Dean’s modus operandi has always been self-sacrifice. He’ll die for a lot of people, but the only person he’ll live for is Sam. And there’s definitely beauty in that.

As for Sam, I was so immensely relieved to see him. The idea of him being in Hell all summer would have made me get even more drunk. I have no idea how he got out, but, for my money, Lucifer’s still inside him and that’s why the light flickered. Next season will feature lots of angst of the “Sam struggles with the (literal) demon inside him” and will furnish Sera “I like it when they cry” Gamble many opportunities to milk the Sam angst train.

Not that there weren’t opportunities galore this episode! Oh Sam. Oh Sam, bb. I love you so much. You love your brother so much. Words cannot describe how much I love that he wrested control away from Lucifer and he jumped. This episode just drove home the point that pretty much all of Sam’s life has been a lie. That he- the rebellious son, the one who wanted to take from life what he wanted and not what he was forced to do- has been betrayed and been misled at every turn.

And then, and then- Dean, the one person Sam loves and respects most in the world, who has, for the past five seasons, not treated Sam as “luggage**” perhaps, but has definitely denied Sam a lot of autonomy, tells Sam that he’s a grown man and he can make his own decisions and Dean will stand by him and respect him for that. The most important theme of this show, after family, is free will, and Sam was finally given the opportunity to exercise it. And he chose to kill himself, to save the world, and, more importantly, to save his brother. I also love that his choice wasn’t presented as doing good versus doing evil but as doing good versus passively allowing Lucifer to do evil. Because moral choices we’re presented in life are so rarely good versus evil, but of good versus the passive allowance of evil to happen.

I am less than pleased by the draining of the demons and the drinking of the demon blood, especially since that didn’t actually work. Show’s been bad the past couple seasons about remembering there are people inside there, and that’s two innocents that were sacrificed, unwillingly, for the greater good.

Jumping around a bit, Chuck! He broke up with us because he respects us too much! He’s God! I’m not too sure how I feel about that, because it makes the Chuck/Becky plotline very weird and unnecessary (okay, arguably that entire episode was unnecessary, but it gave us the epic love story of Demian and Barnes the gay LARPers and “a brother who would die for you”). I like that no one actually got a chance to confront him, though. Some very valid points were raised about the nature of omnipotence and omniscience and fate, but I don’t think there was anyway for show to address them in a satisfying way. Hell, I don’t think there’s anyway for anyone to address the issues raised in a satisfying way. People have been arguing about this shit for thousands of years. And Eric Kripke may be god but he is no Thomas Aquinas.

I do love the idea of God being a writer, of Lucifer and Michael and Sam and Dean being derivations of the same theme. God has told the same story twice, but he’s ended it in two totally different ways. That has interesting implications for fanfiction, too, because fanfiction is all about taking the same story, taking the same theme, and expanding upon it and reworking it. We’re always telling the same story to each other in fanfiction, but we’re also figuring out all the different ways it can be told.

Also, God? Is into chicks who ship wincest. TRUFAX.

Aaaaand speaking of wincest! This is the part where I lose any semblance of coherency. This episode, guys. THIS FUCKING SHOW.

They carved their names into the Impala! They go on dates! Home is in the Impala and with each other! (And how much did I love the use of the Impala in the episode? BUNCHES AND BUNCHES).

More importantly:

THEY STARGAZE TOGETHER!!!!!!

I have such a kink for them stargazing together. I have been wanting to write Sam/Dean stargazing fic forever, and never got around to it. And they just. They. They sit on the Impala and they stare at the stars and they don’t say anything for hours!!!!!!!!

*composes self*

I am so, so tremendously that we got to see all these times when the boys are happy. I get that we don’t get to see that in the show because the emotional drama of the show comes from Sam and Dean’s relationship, and so things often have to be tense and melodramatic between them. But they’re happy with each other, guys. They really are, and we got to see that.

Also, the wincest montage of happiness and joy? Jesus Christ. It’s like they want us to ship it. SAM WINCHESTER’S CRAZY, EPIC, TRAGIC LOVE FOR HIS BROTHER SAVED THE WORLD LADIES AND GENTLEMAN.

Not that Dean loves Sam any less. He may not have gotten the Wincest Montage of Happy Memories, but he did get all the best lines: “If anybody can do it, it’s you.” “Then at least I can be with him when he dies.” “I’m not gonna leave you.” And his broken voice and his broken face and his beautiful, golden soul. Dean Winchester, I am not usually attracted to you, but tonight, I would like you to have sex with me. Man. HE WAS GOING TO GO KILL GOD TO SAVE SAM. HOLY SHIT. (and Dean? It's good to have you on the team!)

Omigod. They love each other so, so, so, so, so, so much. *___*

Also, apparently there was some stuff with Michael and Lucifer and some apocalyptic showdown and I don’t know…I kind of felt bad for Lucy there, Michael you little bitch. I feel like everything was wrapped up more or less satisfactorily. Well, except for the part where Bobby’s soul is still apparently sold to Crowley. And where was he in all of this? I hope he shows up next season and it turns out he betrayed Sam and Dean to the devil, and that’s how Lucifer knew about the rings.

BUT GUYS. GUYS. THEY USED STULLS CEMETERY! I have been waiting for them to use Stulls Cemetery forever. I thought for sure at the end of season 3 that season 4 was going to begin with Sam raising Dean from the dead there. I have ranted about this cemetery to my brother numerous times! And they finally used it! EEK! EEK! (Though, it would have been cool if they actually included the whole bit about it being a gateway to Hell.)

There was also some angel dude! I admit it, Castiel grew on me these last couple episodes. His good-bye scene with Sam melted my frigid, Castiel-hating heart. I was fond! I was accepting that he would be around next season!

AND THEN HE FUCKING EXPLODED.

Kripke would kill off my least favorite character once I started liking him. Except, psych! Not dead! The whole thing about him being an angel again is very strange. Why was he human? That doesn’t…really make sense….Honestly, I kind of would love it a lot if he remained human and then went hunting with Bobby all the time. *g* BOBBY COULD USE A FRIEND. HUMAN!CASTIEL COULD USE SOME GUIDANCE. THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN HIJINKS!

It looks like he won’t be around much next season, and if he is, it will mainly be as Angel of Exposition. SAM. DEAN. THERE’S A VERY IMPORTANT MISSION I NEED YOU TO COMPLETE. I am okay with that!

So I think that’s everything I wanted to address. I am so ready and pumped for season 6, and yes, while I still need some fix it fic (and will probably write some), I am ultimately pleased with this episode. Could have used the Samulet though!

Sera Gamble, I’m yours.

And thank you very much to

familiardevil and

cherie_morte for talking me off the edge. Thank you also to my real life friends for the hugs, sympathy, and alcohol and for still being my friends despite my insane and unhealthy emotional attachment to my show. And thanks, finally, Mom and Dad for letting me drunk dial you and rave about how very, very much the boys love each other.

♥

Current Mood: content
Current Music: hallelujah - jeff buckley (on repeat)